Beers for the Rapture

Since the rapture is upon us, we figured we’d better swing by Abe’s for one “final” visit and pick up some goodies to share with our friends and loved ones as the end draws near.

As we say our goodbyes and send everyone off with well-wishes (wherever they may be going) we’ll be toasting our memories with a Pretty Things Field Mouse’s Farewell, a 7% ABV Golden Ale brewed with barley, wheat, oats, and rye.

We’ll follow our Farewell with a Nogne O Dark Horizon 3rd Edition, while we look ahead and ponder the mystery of our unknown fate. This Russian Imperial Stout with a whopping 15.5% ABV is sure to either ease our worries or lead us into a steady spiral of self-doubt.

Next, as we come to accept the impending doom that is soon to follow, we’ll be sipping on a Brouwerij Het Alternatief Bitter Truth, a 10% ABV Belgian Ale.

Once the sky turns dark and lightning crackles in the distance or whatever is supposed to happen, we will move on to an 7.8% ABV Left Hand Fade to Black Smoked Baltic Porter. After all these high ABV beers, I don’t know if we’d even notice a hurricane or swarms of locusts.

When everyone starts being taken one by one, we’ll send them off with a nice pint of Rogue Dead Guy Ale. This 6.5% maibock should take the edge off for those who are afraid of heights. And I mean, they’re going to be dead in like a couple minutes, right? Might as well have one last beer.

Finally, we figure good beer might be allowed in the afterlife, so we wanted to be personally prepared. So what better or more appropriate beer to be packing on a journey up to the clouds than Stone Levitation Ale? It’s a 4.4% amber ale, nice and tame - so just in case we get in trouble for bringing in outside beverages, at least we didn’t have that 15.5% Dark Horizon on us. Although, what if we’re in that group that doesn’t float up to the sky? Crap. Maybe we should’ve picked up some Russian River Damnation.

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  1. lvcraftbeer posted this

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